Episode 103: It's Just Unwise To Withhold Oxygen Intake At This Point
Rick Rolling...I'm beginning to compile a list of names of users on YouTube that oughtta be strapped down to chairs and have their extremities beaten with sledgehammers. Look, the act of Rick Rolling is simple. First, all you have to do is post something...a cover perhaps. Let's say you wanna nail all those geeks out there (like me...) that wanna see the new leaked trailers for some of the upcoming comic books turned movies. Ok, so you get a little bit of some footage from somewhere ...about five seconds worth and then that's your thumbnail.
Second, you give it a title like Transformers 2 LEAKED TRAILER!!! and then you're all set.
Third, you edit in Rick Astley's video for Never Gonna Give You Up.
Fourth, with editing complete, you post it and watch the havoc begin.
As a user, naturally, you'll click that link to investigate only to find, much to your chagrin, that you've just been Rick Rolled.
After having been Rick Rolled THREE FUCKING TIMES tonight, I'm compiling a hitlist. Pray I don't get someone to make a chair that's portable or you're in deep shit when I find you dickheads. I'm gonna go through my Saw and Hostel movies for ideas now...as far as I'm concerned, laugh it up because it won't last.
Speaking of movies for 2009, it seems most of them are going to be sequels or remakes...no surprise there seeing as how Hollyweird is simply running out of ideas. I could pitch a few but I'm sure that will turn out like one idea I had which I think was pretty cool.
You could get big pharmaceutical companies and even computer companies together. The first ever combination colostomy bag/MP3 Player...The Apple iPood.
See...toldja. Ok, well, fuck you, I think it's cool.
Another thing that many have lodged complaints about is the total lack of 9/11-related material on my show. Before you start asking if I've been bought, let me ask you in response pre-emptively...if that were true...WHAT THE FUCK AM I STILL DOING WORKING?! Ok, with that firmly out of the damn way, we can now move on to some actual news.
Truth be told, I've been waiting. I ask all my listeners to be open-minded and it seemed that shutting down to the No Planes theory would be a bit hypocritical of me. So, I decided I wouldn't do that. I sent out an open invitation to all those who hold that theory to be true several months ago to present me with their findings. I would then take those findings and nitpick through them all. I'd test them. I'd beat the shit out of them and then I'd come back with my own findings and distribute them to all who sent in information.
I've been waiting on these people for several months. Know what I got out of the deal? A good damn reason behind not holding my fucking breath. I didn't get one ounce of information on this from ANYONE. Now that I've officially seen that my generosity has been taken for granted, I'm withdrawing only to NOW suddenly find interested parties. Sorry, all but I'm not waiting any longer on this. You have had a several-month window to win another very vocal convert and you blew it. Go away.
For those who want to whine about it, let me put it to you this way...when I have to have some ne'er-do-well from fucking Backwater, West Virginia hounding me on the goddamn phone with some horrible Tarbash accent telling ME that I'M supposedly talking about this bullshit while waiting on the information (because I have no fucking clue as to what he's talking about) after awhile, my sense of humor about it fucks off and says "Ok, we're done!"
So you've had your seven months or more. Now you don't. I'm not waiting around forever for you to get your shit together.
Finally, just in case you haven't bothered subscribing to the newsletter, we've quit Darkside due to some really huge irritations with scheduling.
It works like this. During our Tuesday slot, there was someone scheduled to be on after us. We didn't know that so we've been planning our shows. Why didn't we know? Because the guy never opened his mouth or added us to Yahoo so that we could properly count down for him. When I say never I mean fucking NEVER added us. That meant I had to cut and run at least a minute early. That's a pain in the fucking ass for someone who doesn't have their shit together. After awhile of this, we threw protocol out the window. We gave him a window, he blew it and we started eating into his time...let him bitch.
Then, it happened again only this time we actually got added and we ended up cancelling the better half of our show to let him on. What happened? No one bothered to train the guy. He DIDN'T know how to work the program, didn't know what he was doing and NEVER took the air. We ended up with wasted time.
We left. It's not Mirage's fault, really. It's more or less that these people don't have any real initiative. Hey, if this thing matters that much to you you'll fucking do something about it, right? Don't expect 'net radio to simply be handed to you. Get in there and fucking do the job.
Needless to say, we bonked out and decided it's time for us all to take some time off...that's exactly what I'm doing...chilling out and relaxing.
When will we be back...Who Knows? We have some leads on some stations. We've made all necessary inquiries now we're just kicking back and waiting on the info to come in. If they don't feel like giving it to us, cool.
In the meantime, I have a few things up my sleeve. I've just been certified to teach Close Quarters Combat. That's the Post-WWII Hand-To-Hand to you and I'm going to use my certification and my minister's credentials to teach a new form of CQC.
I ripped the idea from Fight Club and refined it. I've gotten the idea of self-improvement through self-defense, self-motivation and self-discipline. I'm starting a core group here but this thing will hopefully spread like a damn virus. Right now, Team Havoc only consists of two or three members. We're not looking for people who want to be elite in every aspect of their lives. We're looking for people who ARE elite but need to chip away the rough edges. The self-improvement aspect MUST pervade every aspect of your life. What this means is that in your job and your homelife, you do your best and then a little better with each passing day so that, when things are at their worst, you're at your best. The team aspect comes in when you can use those skills to reach out to your fellow human being. If you can do that and you can inspire them to do the same...you're part of Team Havoc.
Why did I choose the name Team Havoc? Well, quite simply, it's because we don't look at bad situations with a sense of dread and fear. Those things cause you to act in irrational ways. We look upon it with anticipation because we know there are valuable lessons to be learned and, take it from me, adversity truly does introduce you to yourself. If you don't know or like who you are, time to figure it out and adjust accordingly. When things are at their worst, you should be at your best.
Pretty soon (if I can get this boy that moved in with us to get off his rump) the Cry HAVOC! video series will go into full production. That means I'm going to have to whip Phoenix's ass into shape and blow-torch that gut off of him.
Boy do I ever have my work cut out for me.
Second, you give it a title like Transformers 2 LEAKED TRAILER!!! and then you're all set.
Third, you edit in Rick Astley's video for Never Gonna Give You Up.
Fourth, with editing complete, you post it and watch the havoc begin.
As a user, naturally, you'll click that link to investigate only to find, much to your chagrin, that you've just been Rick Rolled.
After having been Rick Rolled THREE FUCKING TIMES tonight, I'm compiling a hitlist. Pray I don't get someone to make a chair that's portable or you're in deep shit when I find you dickheads. I'm gonna go through my Saw and Hostel movies for ideas now...as far as I'm concerned, laugh it up because it won't last.
Speaking of movies for 2009, it seems most of them are going to be sequels or remakes...no surprise there seeing as how Hollyweird is simply running out of ideas. I could pitch a few but I'm sure that will turn out like one idea I had which I think was pretty cool.
You could get big pharmaceutical companies and even computer companies together. The first ever combination colostomy bag/MP3 Player...The Apple iPood.
See...toldja. Ok, well, fuck you, I think it's cool.
Another thing that many have lodged complaints about is the total lack of 9/11-related material on my show. Before you start asking if I've been bought, let me ask you in response pre-emptively...if that were true...WHAT THE FUCK AM I STILL DOING WORKING?! Ok, with that firmly out of the damn way, we can now move on to some actual news.
Truth be told, I've been waiting. I ask all my listeners to be open-minded and it seemed that shutting down to the No Planes theory would be a bit hypocritical of me. So, I decided I wouldn't do that. I sent out an open invitation to all those who hold that theory to be true several months ago to present me with their findings. I would then take those findings and nitpick through them all. I'd test them. I'd beat the shit out of them and then I'd come back with my own findings and distribute them to all who sent in information.
I've been waiting on these people for several months. Know what I got out of the deal? A good damn reason behind not holding my fucking breath. I didn't get one ounce of information on this from ANYONE. Now that I've officially seen that my generosity has been taken for granted, I'm withdrawing only to NOW suddenly find interested parties. Sorry, all but I'm not waiting any longer on this. You have had a several-month window to win another very vocal convert and you blew it. Go away.
For those who want to whine about it, let me put it to you this way...when I have to have some ne'er-do-well from fucking Backwater, West Virginia hounding me on the goddamn phone with some horrible Tarbash accent telling ME that I'M supposedly talking about this bullshit while waiting on the information (because I have no fucking clue as to what he's talking about) after awhile, my sense of humor about it fucks off and says "Ok, we're done!"
So you've had your seven months or more. Now you don't. I'm not waiting around forever for you to get your shit together.
Finally, just in case you haven't bothered subscribing to the newsletter, we've quit Darkside due to some really huge irritations with scheduling.
It works like this. During our Tuesday slot, there was someone scheduled to be on after us. We didn't know that so we've been planning our shows. Why didn't we know? Because the guy never opened his mouth or added us to Yahoo so that we could properly count down for him. When I say never I mean fucking NEVER added us. That meant I had to cut and run at least a minute early. That's a pain in the fucking ass for someone who doesn't have their shit together. After awhile of this, we threw protocol out the window. We gave him a window, he blew it and we started eating into his time...let him bitch.
Then, it happened again only this time we actually got added and we ended up cancelling the better half of our show to let him on. What happened? No one bothered to train the guy. He DIDN'T know how to work the program, didn't know what he was doing and NEVER took the air. We ended up with wasted time.
We left. It's not Mirage's fault, really. It's more or less that these people don't have any real initiative. Hey, if this thing matters that much to you you'll fucking do something about it, right? Don't expect 'net radio to simply be handed to you. Get in there and fucking do the job.
Needless to say, we bonked out and decided it's time for us all to take some time off...that's exactly what I'm doing...chilling out and relaxing.
When will we be back...Who Knows? We have some leads on some stations. We've made all necessary inquiries now we're just kicking back and waiting on the info to come in. If they don't feel like giving it to us, cool.
In the meantime, I have a few things up my sleeve. I've just been certified to teach Close Quarters Combat. That's the Post-WWII Hand-To-Hand to you and I'm going to use my certification and my minister's credentials to teach a new form of CQC.
I ripped the idea from Fight Club and refined it. I've gotten the idea of self-improvement through self-defense, self-motivation and self-discipline. I'm starting a core group here but this thing will hopefully spread like a damn virus. Right now, Team Havoc only consists of two or three members. We're not looking for people who want to be elite in every aspect of their lives. We're looking for people who ARE elite but need to chip away the rough edges. The self-improvement aspect MUST pervade every aspect of your life. What this means is that in your job and your homelife, you do your best and then a little better with each passing day so that, when things are at their worst, you're at your best. The team aspect comes in when you can use those skills to reach out to your fellow human being. If you can do that and you can inspire them to do the same...you're part of Team Havoc.
Why did I choose the name Team Havoc? Well, quite simply, it's because we don't look at bad situations with a sense of dread and fear. Those things cause you to act in irrational ways. We look upon it with anticipation because we know there are valuable lessons to be learned and, take it from me, adversity truly does introduce you to yourself. If you don't know or like who you are, time to figure it out and adjust accordingly. When things are at their worst, you should be at your best.
Pretty soon (if I can get this boy that moved in with us to get off his rump) the Cry HAVOC! video series will go into full production. That means I'm going to have to whip Phoenix's ass into shape and blow-torch that gut off of him.
Boy do I ever have my work cut out for me.
posted by Lord Genocyde at 2:12 AM
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