Episode 112: A Serious Discussion
To All My Friends And First-Time Readers,
I'm glad that you're here. Sit down for awhile, take a load off, light up and get something to drink because we need to have a serious talk now.
As I'm sure you are aware, Barack Obama is now our president-elect. This was one of those elections that was historic in many respects. First, we haven't had a black man go for the Democratic nomination since Jesse Jackson. Second, we haven't had such a lengthy run for a party nomination in my memory. Third, we haven't had a woman picked as a running mate for vice president since Geraldine Ferrara and finally, we haven't had competition so fierce in this nation since the Space Race...even then it was with another nation.
So now that this landmark election has happened, I've decided to compose some of my own thoughts and give a little advice. Here, I'm not going to support or oppose a candidate, I just want you to listen to what I have to say. After that, you can tell me to take a long walk off a short volcano rim if you like.
Okay, now, understand my own qualifications. I associate myself with people from all walks of life. The only criteria that one would need to associate themselves with me is that they can actually think, breathe and take a dump independently, though I do have some friends that can't even do that. The understood criteria is that you must show a little social awareness. You don't have to be culturally diverse in mentality, just socially aware. I also never take racial slurs personally. I'm white and I'm fine with that. I could be any other nationality and be fine with it even if others aren't. I'm also not generally accepted in my own community. If a man being a hoodrat of any color walks down the street of any neighborhood, those that want to beat him down will abandon him because they don't like the local oddity in their midst. I know what it's like to be looked down upon, basically. I know what it's like to be outcast because I like things that no one else here does. I know the hardship of it and I still stuck with it. Some things changed and it's here that our discussion begins and my qualifications will begin to manifest themselves
Reality Checks That Will Not Bounce:
1. Racism/The Man Is Keeping Me Down: Bullshit. I know you're different and that you came up poor. I know that you can't seem to get ahead and I know it's much easier to do other things that aren't exactly right to do it. I can understand that. The point is, it's your attitude keeping you down. No one wanted to hire a metalhead with long hair who walked around wearing Megadeth T-shirts and had no sense of style. Much like you, I emulated my musicians and you know what? No one would hire me. What does that mean? White people in this town were racist against white people? No, I wasn't doing a good job of presenting myself to them. I didn't sell the right way. It was my attitude. Now, it's time to roll up your sleeves and put on something that damn well fits you. My friends of other ethnicities, a black man is president now...if it's a conspiracy of whitey to keep you down, how the hell did we miss that guy?
2. My Pants Sag, I Must Be Cool: Oh man...look. Your pants half hanging off of your ass doesn't make you look cool, it makes you look homeless. Sure, they might be brand new but what the hell makes you think for one instant that it looks so great? The true history on that goes as such. During Slavery Days, it was common for slaves to have rope for belts. When they were taken out into the fields, they had to remove them so guess what their pants did? Later, at San Quentin Prison, some of the inmates would sag their pants. Know who they were? Homosexuals...and they were advertising. If you're cruising for a same-sex date, I have no problem with that but you're not attractive to me and you are not changing my mind...I don't care what your underwear or ass crack looks like. You're not in The Wu-Tang Clan and you're not even a member of A Tribe Called Quest...pull 'em up and use a belt.
3. I'm A Gangsta/Soldja/Warrior: No, you're not. You might have been in some streetfights and you might look pretty tough with your "grillz" but let me tell you something...you don't know a damn thing about being any of those. You wanna be a soldier or a warrior, join the military and get some self-respect. You want to end up dead, go be a Gangsta. Let me tell you one thing. All the real gangsters (yeah, I'm spelling it properly now) are fucking dead...get used to that. Bonnie and Clyde, Babyface Nelson, Al Capone, The Gambinos, Phillip "Gaspipe" Casso...those were gangsters and they're either dead or locked up. Now, what's the difference between those gangsters and you? Some true gangsters actually achieved political power. So where are all the real gangsters, thieves and hustlers now? They're in politics. If you don't believe that, have a look at the following:
Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics:
- 29 have been accused of spousal abuse
- 7 have been arrested for fraud
- 19 have been accused of writing bad checks
- 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
- 3 have done time for assault
- 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
- 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
- 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
- 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
- 84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year
Can you guess which organization this is? Give up yet? It's the 535 members of the United States Congress.
The same group of idiots that crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.
Still Think You A Gangsta?
4. Stop Taking Pride In Your Damn Criminal Record: Look, when you're young and you think it impresses all your impressionable friends...it does! When you get out and you can't support a family...that's the price of being a straight-up gangsta, remember? After you've ended up with your first kid and you can't even support the child because you're out still doing all this crap, I have news for you, I don't wanna hear you crying about it to me. To some, I might have sold out when I shaved my head. I might have sold out when I got a sense of style. I might have even been just another cracka when I took on the job I've got but let me tell you something. I don't have a record and I've got money to pay my bills without having to put myself in extreme danger (though that's debatable too) in order to do it. I will agree with you on one thing. The System Sucks but guess what? You provide me with job security.
5. They Are NOT "Uncle Toms": Look, I've got many black friends, hispanic friends, asian, european, so on and so forth and just because they don't live on the streets of the ghettos and subject themselves to criminal acts doesn't make them any less of a human being than you. I'm sick of hearing those of you out there criticize them for just making a damn living while you make an ass of yourself. They are not you. They have self-respect. Deal with it.
6. What Am I Proposing: It's really simple...clean up your attitude and your act. Adapt, overcome, rise above it. I'm constantly being asked to consider where it is you come from and I have as my qualifications have been listed before. In what I used to consider my hometown, a black man got more respect than I did and you know what? I was on my own for a lot of things but I managed. Shit happens, kid. Life sucks, get a helmet. What you need to realize now is that years from now, when you're about 35 - 40 and you don't have shit to show for the life you lead now (and I guaran-fucking-tee you won't) then you're going to have these words haunting you. I don't care if you're offended. I don't care that I pissed you off. It's time someone told you how things really run.
By the way, I have to ask, since you're so opposed to slavery, how is it you have gold in your mouths encrusted with diamonds. You know where those diamonds come from? Africa! Guess who mines those diamonds. Africans. Guess what the situation is over there? Fucking ugly. Once the mine runs dry, entire neighboring villages get slaughtered and buried in mass graves. You buying your "bling" just funded slavery of what you called your people. Feeling better about that yet?
One more thing, you show me where President Elect Obama is slinging his pants low, tricking out the Presidential limo or flashing gang signs and I'll shut up.
Final item before I head out. If you think things for you are going to be instantly better just because he was elected, then you're about to have a serious reality brick hitting you in the face. Take the time to really get to know yourself. Just think about what I said and when you see Obama on TV next, I want you to know that this is a proud moment for us all. We have the capability to renew our faith in our potential and then make that potential a reality. That is the change we all voted for, right?
Don't blow it.
I'm glad that you're here. Sit down for awhile, take a load off, light up and get something to drink because we need to have a serious talk now.
As I'm sure you are aware, Barack Obama is now our president-elect. This was one of those elections that was historic in many respects. First, we haven't had a black man go for the Democratic nomination since Jesse Jackson. Second, we haven't had such a lengthy run for a party nomination in my memory. Third, we haven't had a woman picked as a running mate for vice president since Geraldine Ferrara and finally, we haven't had competition so fierce in this nation since the Space Race...even then it was with another nation.
So now that this landmark election has happened, I've decided to compose some of my own thoughts and give a little advice. Here, I'm not going to support or oppose a candidate, I just want you to listen to what I have to say. After that, you can tell me to take a long walk off a short volcano rim if you like.
Okay, now, understand my own qualifications. I associate myself with people from all walks of life. The only criteria that one would need to associate themselves with me is that they can actually think, breathe and take a dump independently, though I do have some friends that can't even do that. The understood criteria is that you must show a little social awareness. You don't have to be culturally diverse in mentality, just socially aware. I also never take racial slurs personally. I'm white and I'm fine with that. I could be any other nationality and be fine with it even if others aren't. I'm also not generally accepted in my own community. If a man being a hoodrat of any color walks down the street of any neighborhood, those that want to beat him down will abandon him because they don't like the local oddity in their midst. I know what it's like to be looked down upon, basically. I know what it's like to be outcast because I like things that no one else here does. I know the hardship of it and I still stuck with it. Some things changed and it's here that our discussion begins and my qualifications will begin to manifest themselves
Reality Checks That Will Not Bounce:
1. Racism/The Man Is Keeping Me Down: Bullshit. I know you're different and that you came up poor. I know that you can't seem to get ahead and I know it's much easier to do other things that aren't exactly right to do it. I can understand that. The point is, it's your attitude keeping you down. No one wanted to hire a metalhead with long hair who walked around wearing Megadeth T-shirts and had no sense of style. Much like you, I emulated my musicians and you know what? No one would hire me. What does that mean? White people in this town were racist against white people? No, I wasn't doing a good job of presenting myself to them. I didn't sell the right way. It was my attitude. Now, it's time to roll up your sleeves and put on something that damn well fits you. My friends of other ethnicities, a black man is president now...if it's a conspiracy of whitey to keep you down, how the hell did we miss that guy?
2. My Pants Sag, I Must Be Cool: Oh man...look. Your pants half hanging off of your ass doesn't make you look cool, it makes you look homeless. Sure, they might be brand new but what the hell makes you think for one instant that it looks so great? The true history on that goes as such. During Slavery Days, it was common for slaves to have rope for belts. When they were taken out into the fields, they had to remove them so guess what their pants did? Later, at San Quentin Prison, some of the inmates would sag their pants. Know who they were? Homosexuals...and they were advertising. If you're cruising for a same-sex date, I have no problem with that but you're not attractive to me and you are not changing my mind...I don't care what your underwear or ass crack looks like. You're not in The Wu-Tang Clan and you're not even a member of A Tribe Called Quest...pull 'em up and use a belt.
3. I'm A Gangsta/Soldja/Warrior: No, you're not. You might have been in some streetfights and you might look pretty tough with your "grillz" but let me tell you something...you don't know a damn thing about being any of those. You wanna be a soldier or a warrior, join the military and get some self-respect. You want to end up dead, go be a Gangsta. Let me tell you one thing. All the real gangsters (yeah, I'm spelling it properly now) are fucking dead...get used to that. Bonnie and Clyde, Babyface Nelson, Al Capone, The Gambinos, Phillip "Gaspipe" Casso...those were gangsters and they're either dead or locked up. Now, what's the difference between those gangsters and you? Some true gangsters actually achieved political power. So where are all the real gangsters, thieves and hustlers now? They're in politics. If you don't believe that, have a look at the following:
Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics:
- 29 have been accused of spousal abuse
- 7 have been arrested for fraud
- 19 have been accused of writing bad checks
- 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
- 3 have done time for assault
- 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
- 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
- 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
- 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
- 84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year
Can you guess which organization this is? Give up yet? It's the 535 members of the United States Congress.
The same group of idiots that crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.
Still Think You A Gangsta?
4. Stop Taking Pride In Your Damn Criminal Record: Look, when you're young and you think it impresses all your impressionable friends...it does! When you get out and you can't support a family...that's the price of being a straight-up gangsta, remember? After you've ended up with your first kid and you can't even support the child because you're out still doing all this crap, I have news for you, I don't wanna hear you crying about it to me. To some, I might have sold out when I shaved my head. I might have sold out when I got a sense of style. I might have even been just another cracka when I took on the job I've got but let me tell you something. I don't have a record and I've got money to pay my bills without having to put myself in extreme danger (though that's debatable too) in order to do it. I will agree with you on one thing. The System Sucks but guess what? You provide me with job security.
5. They Are NOT "Uncle Toms": Look, I've got many black friends, hispanic friends, asian, european, so on and so forth and just because they don't live on the streets of the ghettos and subject themselves to criminal acts doesn't make them any less of a human being than you. I'm sick of hearing those of you out there criticize them for just making a damn living while you make an ass of yourself. They are not you. They have self-respect. Deal with it.
6. What Am I Proposing: It's really simple...clean up your attitude and your act. Adapt, overcome, rise above it. I'm constantly being asked to consider where it is you come from and I have as my qualifications have been listed before. In what I used to consider my hometown, a black man got more respect than I did and you know what? I was on my own for a lot of things but I managed. Shit happens, kid. Life sucks, get a helmet. What you need to realize now is that years from now, when you're about 35 - 40 and you don't have shit to show for the life you lead now (and I guaran-fucking-tee you won't) then you're going to have these words haunting you. I don't care if you're offended. I don't care that I pissed you off. It's time someone told you how things really run.
By the way, I have to ask, since you're so opposed to slavery, how is it you have gold in your mouths encrusted with diamonds. You know where those diamonds come from? Africa! Guess who mines those diamonds. Africans. Guess what the situation is over there? Fucking ugly. Once the mine runs dry, entire neighboring villages get slaughtered and buried in mass graves. You buying your "bling" just funded slavery of what you called your people. Feeling better about that yet?
One more thing, you show me where President Elect Obama is slinging his pants low, tricking out the Presidential limo or flashing gang signs and I'll shut up.
Final item before I head out. If you think things for you are going to be instantly better just because he was elected, then you're about to have a serious reality brick hitting you in the face. Take the time to really get to know yourself. Just think about what I said and when you see Obama on TV next, I want you to know that this is a proud moment for us all. We have the capability to renew our faith in our potential and then make that potential a reality. That is the change we all voted for, right?
Don't blow it.
posted by Lord Genocyde at 4:16 AM
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