Already Gone: The New Jersey Chronicles vol 2.
We ended up waking up early. I'm not a morning person. I never have been and today was going to be one of those days where I had to be on my guard. I'd been through and even into New York City only one time in my entire life and I didn't get to stay very long. I knew it was the most aggressive city on the face of the planet and I was going to be smack-dab in the fucking middle of this thing.
Misty's nephew, Jay, needed to go there. It was a meeting downtown near Union Square Park. So, on this morning, I got up and strapped shit on. I chose the big black overcoat because no one was going to reach past that big heavy fucker to get into my grabit pack to get anything out of it before I kicked them squarely in the nuts...or tear their hands off as they tried the old bump n' grab technique.
I was ready and probably looked like something out of The Matrix.
Next was getting over to Jay's place to meet up with him. Now, this is where our story takes a hellish turn...or begins to. Right there at Jay's place, I reached up, pushed the bridge of my favorite sunglasses up on my nose and...they broke. My favorite shades in the world finally gave up the ghost. See, the legs and bridge were bolted to the lenses to give them that rimless look and here I was, my eyes would be killing me by midday and I'd need to get somewhere dark for several hours to recover and nothing to protect my eyes.
Houston, we have a problem. I knew goddamn good and well I shoulda brought my damn goggles for this one. See, with me, eyewear has to be carefully selected. I had two pair of new shades being sent to Misty's but the thing is, they weren't there yet and they weren't going to be there for a couple of days. Misty to the rescue...she had a spare pair. The only problem was I looked like John Lennon if he had been rescued by Morpheus. They were these huge John Lennon shades with silver frames and blue lenses. Needless to say, I refused to go on camera with those motherfuckers on...use your imagination and shut up.
Not that it would really matter in New York City. People were too busy hauling ass to hell to notice a goddamned thing about you.
Now, I've seen buses in movies and the movies are full of shit about those things too. The bathrooms on those things are even smaller than the puddlejumper airplane that took me from Lake Chuck to Houston. I had to pee really badly at one point in the trip but didn't feel like pulling a contortionist act to do it so I stood fast on that one. God help me if I needed to take a dump suddenly. From the look of it, I didn't know how the hell I'd wash my hands afterward.
When we finally saw the New York Skyline in the distance, I tried getting pics with my phone but, no dice...they didn't turn out. Sun was in the way. I remember going through at night eight years ago and seeing the World Trade Center Towers in the distance and, even though I've spent the past few studying every piece of video footage I could...it was still weird to me to see that they were gone. The reality of it really settled in.
Finally, we were at Port Authority bus station. Venturing out into the streets is where it all began.
I'd just grabbed the program CameraBag for iPhone the night before and did this with one of the street scenes I'd taken. It really made for sort of an artsy photo that looked realistic. I liked it. Of course I have more but Misty didn't post them and I don't feel like going through the tedium right now so here you go.
This is where I felt like the iPhone really shined through for me. Unlimited internet and all, I still felt bad about dropping $200 on it but then that GPS device really kept us from looking like total tourists. Why? Because it was only 2.1 miles to where we needed to go by foot. The only unfortunate miscalculation that I'd made were Misty's feet. They tend to swell and hurt quite a bit and so we made frequent stops. Jay walked like Darth Vader trying to reach the bathroom with a turtle head poking out and we constantly had to make checks on the electronic map where a little blue pulsing dot moved with us. I'll post more of those pics later but I noticed something...nobody had time. No one could be bothered with this, that or the other thing. They all had to be somewhere quickly and many of them all had their music going via iPod or MP3 player of some variety. Back in Louisiana, I get the strangest looks for having the gall and audacity to wear one and listen to music while I'm out. I wouldn't need it if Darwin's Typical Hairless Ape Villagers had something other than an insult or threat to put out there. Here, it was common practice and not even noticed. We got Jay to the building where the offices were, dropped him off and almost walked to Fashion Avenue. Misty wanted to dress me but we thought better of it. It was a long way to make two trips.
We opted to get a drink and head to the park instead. Stuyveysant Park looks like this during Autumn...it's just bloody beautiful.
And, of course, had to get a shot of my girl in this one
Now, all of this was great until we hit this place...then...I howled in laughter. I could barely hold the phone still enough to take a decent pic of it.
What I did find odd about New York City was that the office building in which Jay had vanished...it was right next to this place. I've heard of this order before but I have no idea what they're about and they weren't exactly open so I could find out but...have a look.
Interesting that they wouldn't be open on a Wednesday morning during business hours.
During our walk, we ended up just moving around Union Square Park and some of the places nearby. There was this Halloween Costume Shop that I ended up devising a wicked plan. A young man stood outside the place handing out promotional cards that served as ads and then hugging people. I can't contend with that kinda positive attitude. I accepted one from this Tinky Winky costumed man. Difference was, he got a Lord Genocyde Hug You Cannon right back as I picked him up and twisted from side to side. I could tell by the look in his eyes when I put him down that he was NOT prepared for that one. I could tell by the laughter from Misty...that she wasn't either. Most people worry about being mugged in New York City but this guy got hugged by the emperor. Hell yeah.
I ended up getting that picture shortly thereafter.
We passed some more time in the shop looking around at things. At one point, I walked about with a dreadlocked wig on talking in a Jamaican accent which NO ONE but me found funny. Maybe it was that spice-addled fart I ripped, who the hell knows?
Between walking and seeing the mass of McCain/Palin T-shirts and Obama/Biden t-shirts, I noticed this poster and had to have a pic of it.
Cute when she's rabid, ain't she?
Right there in Union Square there were veggie stands, t-shirt vendors and some of those t-shirts made me wish I'd grabbed some cash along the way somewhere. They had shirts featuring images of groups of Native Americans carrying rifles and shotguns that said Homeland Security: Fighting Terrorism Since 1814.
I'm not entirely sure how much time we passed walking around, looking at all of this stuff but, before we knew it, Jay was calling us. His meeting was over. We needed to go back, pick him up and go find a place to eat, pronto. That, we did.
Once we met up, we'd walked and walked until we found a Subway to duck into. While we were sitting there, I did a quick map check on the phone and then began discussing Conspiracies with Jay. Jay wanted to know what was honestly on my mind and I began to address it as best I could. Naturally, I'm in New York City...home of one of the biggest Agendas to date. I had to choose my words carefully.
I told him I could go on and on about Reptilian/alien/human/hybrid/satanic cults but that would be hard to prove. Even if you could, it would be laughed at and ridiculed for all time until you could actually produce one really hardcore bit of proof. I had to be able to stick with what's known because it's more or less an incomplete criminal investigation. Those of you that know me well know that I harbor a deep distrust for our current government and that I think Bill O'Reilly is nothing more than some condescending blowhard choirboy with a temper and not one single bit of testicular fortitude to his name. I explained to Jay just how screwed up our legal system is and how it comes down to how those that are truly in power would like to keep it that way.
We continued discussing this as we made our way back to Port Authority Bus Station. On the way there, the lights of the city were coming on which meant that I could actually take those damned John Lennon shades off and stick them into the inner pocket of my overcoat. Many more people were coming out in droves. Into the night they came, the rush hour crowds and the people on the streets pushing CDs and the like. The only problem (and the reason I didn't come back with any) was that no cash meant no donations and that's what most of them required for their CDs. Most of them were bands that I couldn't push on my show due to genre constraints anyway. Entire masses of people made their way across avenues and boulevards that we were crossing or walking along and you'd think that they'd have some time to slow down but many of them were still in their hurry as though home wouldn't be there if they didn't get home in time. By this time, it was getting too dark for me to take any pictures with my phone. About the only thing I could do with it at this point was just stop and make map checks. Misty's feet were killing her by the time we had made it and by then, we were all so tired that all we wanted to do was use the bathroom and board the bus back to Jersey.
On the way into New York, we were all sitting together but by the time we boarded, we all ended up scattered and separated.
Once back in Jersey, our tired spirits lifted again and Misty and I settled in for the night. She was just thankful to finally be off her feet and so was I. She'd really suffered for that trip
More to come...
Misty's nephew, Jay, needed to go there. It was a meeting downtown near Union Square Park. So, on this morning, I got up and strapped shit on. I chose the big black overcoat because no one was going to reach past that big heavy fucker to get into my grabit pack to get anything out of it before I kicked them squarely in the nuts...or tear their hands off as they tried the old bump n' grab technique.
I was ready and probably looked like something out of The Matrix.
Next was getting over to Jay's place to meet up with him. Now, this is where our story takes a hellish turn...or begins to. Right there at Jay's place, I reached up, pushed the bridge of my favorite sunglasses up on my nose and...they broke. My favorite shades in the world finally gave up the ghost. See, the legs and bridge were bolted to the lenses to give them that rimless look and here I was, my eyes would be killing me by midday and I'd need to get somewhere dark for several hours to recover and nothing to protect my eyes.
Houston, we have a problem. I knew goddamn good and well I shoulda brought my damn goggles for this one. See, with me, eyewear has to be carefully selected. I had two pair of new shades being sent to Misty's but the thing is, they weren't there yet and they weren't going to be there for a couple of days. Misty to the rescue...she had a spare pair. The only problem was I looked like John Lennon if he had been rescued by Morpheus. They were these huge John Lennon shades with silver frames and blue lenses. Needless to say, I refused to go on camera with those motherfuckers on...use your imagination and shut up.
Not that it would really matter in New York City. People were too busy hauling ass to hell to notice a goddamned thing about you.
Now, I've seen buses in movies and the movies are full of shit about those things too. The bathrooms on those things are even smaller than the puddlejumper airplane that took me from Lake Chuck to Houston. I had to pee really badly at one point in the trip but didn't feel like pulling a contortionist act to do it so I stood fast on that one. God help me if I needed to take a dump suddenly. From the look of it, I didn't know how the hell I'd wash my hands afterward.
When we finally saw the New York Skyline in the distance, I tried getting pics with my phone but, no dice...they didn't turn out. Sun was in the way. I remember going through at night eight years ago and seeing the World Trade Center Towers in the distance and, even though I've spent the past few studying every piece of video footage I could...it was still weird to me to see that they were gone. The reality of it really settled in.
Finally, we were at Port Authority bus station. Venturing out into the streets is where it all began.
I'd just grabbed the program CameraBag for iPhone the night before and did this with one of the street scenes I'd taken. It really made for sort of an artsy photo that looked realistic. I liked it. Of course I have more but Misty didn't post them and I don't feel like going through the tedium right now so here you go.
This is where I felt like the iPhone really shined through for me. Unlimited internet and all, I still felt bad about dropping $200 on it but then that GPS device really kept us from looking like total tourists. Why? Because it was only 2.1 miles to where we needed to go by foot. The only unfortunate miscalculation that I'd made were Misty's feet. They tend to swell and hurt quite a bit and so we made frequent stops. Jay walked like Darth Vader trying to reach the bathroom with a turtle head poking out and we constantly had to make checks on the electronic map where a little blue pulsing dot moved with us. I'll post more of those pics later but I noticed something...nobody had time. No one could be bothered with this, that or the other thing. They all had to be somewhere quickly and many of them all had their music going via iPod or MP3 player of some variety. Back in Louisiana, I get the strangest looks for having the gall and audacity to wear one and listen to music while I'm out. I wouldn't need it if Darwin's Typical Hairless Ape Villagers had something other than an insult or threat to put out there. Here, it was common practice and not even noticed. We got Jay to the building where the offices were, dropped him off and almost walked to Fashion Avenue. Misty wanted to dress me but we thought better of it. It was a long way to make two trips.
We opted to get a drink and head to the park instead. Stuyveysant Park looks like this during Autumn...it's just bloody beautiful.
And, of course, had to get a shot of my girl in this one
Now, all of this was great until we hit this place...then...I howled in laughter. I could barely hold the phone still enough to take a decent pic of it.
What I did find odd about New York City was that the office building in which Jay had vanished...it was right next to this place. I've heard of this order before but I have no idea what they're about and they weren't exactly open so I could find out but...have a look.
Interesting that they wouldn't be open on a Wednesday morning during business hours.
During our walk, we ended up just moving around Union Square Park and some of the places nearby. There was this Halloween Costume Shop that I ended up devising a wicked plan. A young man stood outside the place handing out promotional cards that served as ads and then hugging people. I can't contend with that kinda positive attitude. I accepted one from this Tinky Winky costumed man. Difference was, he got a Lord Genocyde Hug You Cannon right back as I picked him up and twisted from side to side. I could tell by the look in his eyes when I put him down that he was NOT prepared for that one. I could tell by the laughter from Misty...that she wasn't either. Most people worry about being mugged in New York City but this guy got hugged by the emperor. Hell yeah.
I ended up getting that picture shortly thereafter.
We passed some more time in the shop looking around at things. At one point, I walked about with a dreadlocked wig on talking in a Jamaican accent which NO ONE but me found funny. Maybe it was that spice-addled fart I ripped, who the hell knows?
Between walking and seeing the mass of McCain/Palin T-shirts and Obama/Biden t-shirts, I noticed this poster and had to have a pic of it.
Cute when she's rabid, ain't she?
Right there in Union Square there were veggie stands, t-shirt vendors and some of those t-shirts made me wish I'd grabbed some cash along the way somewhere. They had shirts featuring images of groups of Native Americans carrying rifles and shotguns that said Homeland Security: Fighting Terrorism Since 1814.
I'm not entirely sure how much time we passed walking around, looking at all of this stuff but, before we knew it, Jay was calling us. His meeting was over. We needed to go back, pick him up and go find a place to eat, pronto. That, we did.
Once we met up, we'd walked and walked until we found a Subway to duck into. While we were sitting there, I did a quick map check on the phone and then began discussing Conspiracies with Jay. Jay wanted to know what was honestly on my mind and I began to address it as best I could. Naturally, I'm in New York City...home of one of the biggest Agendas to date. I had to choose my words carefully.
I told him I could go on and on about Reptilian/alien/human/hybrid/satanic cults but that would be hard to prove. Even if you could, it would be laughed at and ridiculed for all time until you could actually produce one really hardcore bit of proof. I had to be able to stick with what's known because it's more or less an incomplete criminal investigation. Those of you that know me well know that I harbor a deep distrust for our current government and that I think Bill O'Reilly is nothing more than some condescending blowhard choirboy with a temper and not one single bit of testicular fortitude to his name. I explained to Jay just how screwed up our legal system is and how it comes down to how those that are truly in power would like to keep it that way.
We continued discussing this as we made our way back to Port Authority Bus Station. On the way there, the lights of the city were coming on which meant that I could actually take those damned John Lennon shades off and stick them into the inner pocket of my overcoat. Many more people were coming out in droves. Into the night they came, the rush hour crowds and the people on the streets pushing CDs and the like. The only problem (and the reason I didn't come back with any) was that no cash meant no donations and that's what most of them required for their CDs. Most of them were bands that I couldn't push on my show due to genre constraints anyway. Entire masses of people made their way across avenues and boulevards that we were crossing or walking along and you'd think that they'd have some time to slow down but many of them were still in their hurry as though home wouldn't be there if they didn't get home in time. By this time, it was getting too dark for me to take any pictures with my phone. About the only thing I could do with it at this point was just stop and make map checks. Misty's feet were killing her by the time we had made it and by then, we were all so tired that all we wanted to do was use the bathroom and board the bus back to Jersey.
On the way into New York, we were all sitting together but by the time we boarded, we all ended up scattered and separated.
Once back in Jersey, our tired spirits lifted again and Misty and I settled in for the night. She was just thankful to finally be off her feet and so was I. She'd really suffered for that trip
More to come...
posted by Lord Genocyde at 10:46 PM
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